QUALIFICATIONS
Palin: Former mayor of a small Alaska town, she was elected governor of the state in 2006 and has served less than two years in that office.
Lemon: "Who's got two thumbs, speaks limited French, and hasn't cried once today? This moi."
GAY MARRIAGE
Palin: Against gay marriage and supports a federal gay marriage ban.
Lemon: "Just because I think gay dudes should be allowed to adopt kids and we should all have hybrid cars doesn't mean I don't love America."
THE ECONOMY
Palin: Believes that the Republicans can help get the economy and markets back on track, aimed to reduce general fund spending in Alaska by $150 million.
Lemon: "I've got, like, 12 grand in checking."
EXES
Palin: The Alaska legislature is investigating whether she put pressure on a state official to fire her ex-brother-in-law, a state trooper.
Lemon: "Last week was my birthday and everyone forgot except Dennis. He called and we went out and it wasn't weird."
Jenna: "And how was the sex?"
Lemon: "Fast and only on Saturdays&mda's perfect!"
In conclusion, Barack Obama must immediately retract his nomination of Joe Biden, thus leaving him free to appoint fictional character Liz Lemon the new vice president of the Unites States of America.
- Specs Thing [Hollywood Elsewhere]
Defamer
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