Ill-fated Romances: Charles And The Real Girl

Ill-fated Romances: Charles And The Real Girl
Providing a light-hearted respite from recent unpleasant revelations about Charlie Sheen's propensity to send strongly worded, less-than-affirming e-mails (you remember, the ones about the cancer and the "sad, jobless pigs" ) to his ex-wife, Rush & Molloy recounts how a Two and a Half Men joke involving an inflatable doll reminds them of a funny little story about Sheen's real-life misadventures with the finest mail-order cheerleader mannequin money can buy:

Sheen also knows something about this subject. A few years back, we're told, he bought a $6,000 anatomically correct latex girl dressed in a cheerleader's outfit. According to an insider, Sheen was quite open about the doll -- even bringing it to the set of his old show "Spin City."


But then came the night when, according to our source, Sheen tried to get two female party companions interested in a foursome with the bouncy cheerleader.

"They couldn't stop laughing at him," says the snitch. "Charlie got so mad that he ran the girls out of his house. Then he took a meat cleaver and chopped one of the doll's hands off. He and his bodyguard tried to dispose of it, like it was a real body. They wrapped it in a blanket and drove around in the middle of the night till they found a Dumpster."



It's impossible not to compare Sheen's story to the upcoming Ryan Gosling vehicle Lars and the Real Girl; unfortunately for the actor's dead-eyed, pigtailed companion, however, his cold-hearted friends refused to come together and treat his doll like a member of their family to help him through his emotional crisis, instead making him feel ashamed of his new girlfriend. But Sheen's tale is not completely devoid of uplift; in the end, he did learn he could depend on them to help him dispose of the body when he figured out the relationship didn't have long-term potential.
Published 10/9/07 by


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