Kellie Pickler breaks down performing at the CMA Awards

Former “American Idol” contestant Kellie Pickler performed at the Country Music Awards last night while singing a song she wrote about her mother, who abandoned Pickler when she was two. Cynthia Malone abandoned Kellie after suffering several years of extreme abuse at the hands of Kellie’s father (who was in jail at the time Kellie was on American Idol, and has been back twice since then). Malone has said the beatings were so bad while she was pregnant that she had to take medication to prevent premature contractions. In an interview with the Charlotte News Observer, Kellie’s mom noted, “I knew God had to have a purpose for [Kellie] because there was too many times I would have miscarried because of all the hitting and beating on my stomach.” Her descriptions of abuse are pretty severe, but she also said, “When you’re in that place, you have to make a decision: her life or yours. I’d given her life, but I didn’t want to lose mine.” Malone left Kellie with her abusive father, though she eventually ended up mostly living with her paternal grandparents. Kellie wrote the song, “I Wonder” about her mother, and it’s currently at number 15 on the country charts. She gave a heartbreaking performance of it last night.

Kellie Pickler, “American Idol” alum, was swept away with emotion during her performance at the CMA Awards on Wednesday night. The singer performed, “I Wonder,” which tackles her relationship with her estranged mother, who has not been in Pickler’s life since she was 2 years old, as reported by People. As she sang, “Oh, I hear the weather’s nice in California,” tears streamed down her face. “And just in case you’re wondering about me/ From now on I won’t be in Carolina/ Your little girl is off to Tennessee,” the song continued.

Pickler did her best to finish the song, speaking the last word, “Tennessee,” to a standing ovation from the crowd. This is not Kellie’s first time dealing with parental problems. During her stint on “Idol,” her father, Clyde Raymond Pickler, was serving time in jail. After being released, he encountered more problems after reportedly being arrested for allegedly assaulting a woman with a steak knife.

Regardless of her past personal struggles, Kellie has achieved success in both music and television. After being booted from “Idol,” Pickler released her debut album “Small Town Girl” in October 2006. It was certified Gold for selling more than 500,000 copies. The singer also has a sitcom in development at Fox.

[From Access Hollywood]

Kellie’s story is incredibly empowering. There are few things in the world as hard to deal with as feeling like you were abandoned by your mother, and it’s not something you ever really get over. Kellie has done an incredible job of cultivating her talent and making a great life for herself. Whenever she’s interviewed, she comes across as really positive and upbeat, though at times a little too much so. Either way she gave a stirring and beautiful performance of her song, and it looks like things will only continue to get better for her.

Published 11/8/07 by


Cele|bitchy

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Comments (1)

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  • Dear Kellie,

    I am so proud of you and your achievements and being adopted at 2 and finding my brothers and sisters in 1992 have brought me full circle. I had a tough life myself and have two grown children and husband. You are a beautiful young...
    Anonymous 11/11/07 Reply