Britney Spears Checks in, out of Rehab

The pop star entered a rehab facility two days ago… Brit was at Eric Clapton’s Crossroads rehab facility in Antigua. Britney checked in at the urging of friends and family, after being seen intoxicated in public places and was so “exhausted” on New Year’s Eve she collapsed.

You know you’re a gigantic failure when Lindsay Lohan seems less ed-up than you. Really, at least Lindsay stuck it out for more than a day. I just don’t know what Britney was thinking. It’s not like anyone ever gets “cured” in 24 hours. The best the staff can do in one day is tie you to the bed and keep IV’s in you while you throw up and hallucinate and scream obscenities like a coked-up sailor. Usually, if you want out in just one day like Britney, you have to kill an orderly or two and then change your name and dye your hair. And then you need to find a job where you can work from inside your home and never have to risk going out in public. Something low-key, like, say, writing from home. I think I’ve already said too much.

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