It's not like she even flaunts them. She doesn't have to. They're just there, drawing small satellites into their orbit and causing the odd minor eclipse of lesser bodies.
To wit: the above photograph. Salma, bless her well-padded heart, is wearing what can only be described as a Hideous Tan Pantsuit, of the sort that Mary Tyler Moore wore in the latter days of The Mary Tyler Show and which ordinarily only comes in certain blends of polyester and achieves its greatest effect when topped with a tight perm. But Salma - dear, pneumatic Salma - need only pair her HTP with a low-cut eggplant blouse and voila! ALL YOU SEE ARE THE TITTIES. The Hideous Tan Pantsuit recedes entirely into the background, a sartorial afterthought to the purple balloons being brandished gaily out front. Is it magic? Or science? I cannot, for the life of me, figure this out, and so it is that I am condemned to stare obsessively at this picture, trying to work out whether George Lucas and the Industrial Light and Magic team has anything to do with the Salma Effect, for the rest of the morning, or until I come down off of this caffeine rush.
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